Home: An Exploration Of Otherness
As an international student living in Canada, the ‘concept’ of the home has become very elusive. Its concrete feeling of comfort and belonging has slowly faded away, becoming nothing but a conceptual possibility that I find myself yearning for, with each passing day.
Home for me is a third space, captured between two snapshots, both of my life in Canada and my life back in Nigeria. I do not feel as though I quite belong in any of these places, and so this third space that I embrace as home is a reflection of an erosion, clash, crisis, and loss of my self-identity.
Home for me is a psychological marginalization and an emotional separation from my physical and temporal existence. Home for me is an incessant, daunting feeling of otherness, occasionally replaced by the ephemeral jolt of anticipation, agitation, and adventure.
As gloomy as my representation of home might be, there is a contrasting feeling of liberation that comes from not belonging anywhere, because then my existence becomes fluid enough, that I can adapt everywhere. So, home for me is neither a place, nor a community, rather, when I am asked what home means to me, I respond simply by saying, home for me is, alienation and emancipation.